Monday, September 14, 2009


yes, that's what my life feels like (emotionally) right now. we are in another swirl of events....putting the house up for sale--only to see if it will sell, = to see if the Lord wants us to be elsewhere. we have come to love this place! i love my house!! will i ever get another one like it? i really want to hear the Lord on everything, and understand His ways....alas, they are not my ways.
i feel this push to leave.
i feel shoved and pushed, really. (mainly by the Lord, all the events that have occurred i cannot control!)
i guess i'm a long-haul type of person, slow adjusting to change...takes me a long time (2 weeks or more) to even adjust to my husband getting new shoes! wow.....that's just the way i am.
so yeah, i'm prone to jealousy when others around me are loving change, loving the idea of leaving, so at peace... and full of joy in believing.
Lord give me joy and peace in believing!! help me to believe you have a great future and a purpose for my life, somewhere!!! the placement of our future seems so unknown.
i don't really want to move. but yet i know i won't want to stay when all my friends around me are gone. i will feel that for certain when they are gone. i cannot fathom that yet. still in denial.

one line from the Lord of the Rings--Return of the King that keeps going through my mind--

"What say you? What say you? What say You?"

That is my cry to the Lord right now.

*thanks for listening to my inner-processing, most likely to change in 2-3 days. :)


  1. i TOTALLY understand how you feel, friend!

  2. I would miss you guys SOOOO much if you move!